i'm tired.

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sch wad rather bad.i got emo,and tears just roll out of a sudden.Well,i find that the world is complicated.Complications sometimes makes things perfect,but i think its not.I went out of control after crying.I threw tantrums and i don't feel like speaking to anyone.

And the reason for being emo,is due to some things which i don't wanna mention.That made me so pissed to the extend i feel like roaring at that someone.Since you want to have it,then why should i bother to fight it with you,when you and i had different status now. And i lied blindly with the excuse to the toilet with a bad tummy ache.And with that excuse,perhaps person AB would thought that i don't like AB or sth.Which in fact,no.I'm sorry to show this kind of attitude,hope AB won't mind.I'm just way too pissed off to think.

and with that excuse,i saw victor sitting at the bookshop and decided to take a sit and chatted with him.Talking lots of nonsensical logics and chim-logy into him.He tried comforting me,thanks lots for doing that.But it didn't make me feel better but more to breaking down into tears.

After their dance under the sun,they decided to rest where me and victor were.Well,i must really thanks NI for covering up with the blind lie,and the fact that i was crying.PErhaps one of the reasons lies in listening too much EMO songs,and its due to the fact that i'm being bugged by personal stuffs,school stuffs,friendships.

I'm too bugged by everything in my life.sometimes,i would even find that having a dream during my sleep was hard.some things are just bugging me,i know yet i tried to escape.Even at times i would blame XB for it to decieve myself.But at times,the deceieving part just don't work.I want my family back,I want myself back.That's all i request for.

Labels: pissed

I didn't attend school today.Rather suckie,got questioned by ms see as i turned up for my CCA.Gosh me,i shouldn't have done that.

Well,let me summarised my results.

English Paper 2 : 21.5/70
E Maths :61/100
A Maths :37/100
Physics :31/50
Chemistry :26/50
Chinese :70++/110 for paper 2
Art :72/100
Social Studies :18/50
Chinese literature :25/50

In conclusion,the subjects i failed are,

A Maths
Combined Humans
English

And the papers i passed are :

Combined Science (Physics and Chemistry)
Art
E Maths
Chinese

WOW,i failed 3 SUBJECTS.Gosh me.And here's the artpiece of mine and honqi which we attended the long-time ago CCA which we never attend.



Well,basically,this is my artpiece.I know the characters are ugly lahs.BUT!!take a look,i'm drawing tons of rocks,mountains,water fountains etc.Its like so damn messy.Initially,i thought after adding on to colours,its nice.Yet,the teacher go add so mnay damn extra colours until so weirdo looking lo.



ITs honqi piece.

and on our way home after buying my dinner,i caught some pictures delibrately.Well,this is honqi.Guess when she sees it,she'll kill me for sure.



and this fat ass,talked so loudly in the bus regarding house matters.Wth!does she know she's disturbing peace in the bus?inconsiderate people.

And people,i tio parents meeting!!!FUCK lahs.

Labels: ccs, Results

well,when i was in the hall,my thoughts just ran wild.I was thinking of all sorts of rubbish.I even thought "why do people try to get near their friends that were isolated long time ago by them out of a sudden."Do they have other motives?

It made me thought for long,and i came to a conclusion.Yes,its with a motive.They're guilty of how they treated you by isolating you out of their lives,now they're trying to compensate their mistakes.Well,not that simple.Humans are evil creatures,and their mind ain't pure once polluted.They would want more of you,yes.More to get your pockets empty.Yes,plus the empty promises made by them.

And when you do things for them,you would think that your effort ain't worth them.Even at times,you would give up.But,its the word "FRIENDSHIP" that's holding on to you.Just like the peg holding on to the clothes logic.Sooner or later,even the "clothes" won't even give face to the "pegs",and it'll SNAP!

What i wrote is how i felt,TERRIBLE.and to such extent,i almost cried.Yet,tears just wouldn't flow freely as they would in the past.How i wish to say "Get off!I'm not your prey,LEECH!!" but yet,i just hung to the word "FRIENDSHIP" and let my blood being sucked.What kind of world is this?A realistic world of working society.Yes,it is.The reality is Cruel.Yet,they wouldn't come in a soft and nice way but hit you nice and hard.Which will cause you to Scream 'OUCH!'

Thanks for being so sweet guys.Efforts would be appreciated.=]

Labels: sentimental thoughts

i'm obsessed with the song "thnks fr th mrms".Frustrating out all those fucking stuffs.Its the best way to do it besides slamming things.




I'm gonna make you bend and break.
Say a prayer, but let the good times roll,
In case god doesn't show.

Let the good times roll.
Let the good times roll.

And I want these words to make things right,
But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life.
"Who does he think he is?"
If that's the worst you got,
Better put your fingers back to the keys.

One night and one more time.
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren't so great.
"He tastes like you only sweeter."

One night, yeah, and one more time.
Thanks for the memories.
Thanks for the memories.
"See, he tastes like you only sweeter."

Ohhhhhh.

Been looking forward to the future,
But my eyesight is going bad.
And this crystal ball,
Is always cloudy,
Except for when you look into the past.
One night stand.
One night stand off.

One night and one more time.
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren't so great.
"He tastes like you only sweeter."

One night, yeah, and one more time.
Thanks for the memories.
Thanks for the memories.
"See, he tastes like you only sweeter."

Ohhhhhh.

They say I only think in the form of crunching numbers.
In hotel rooms,
Collecting page six lovers.
Get me out of my mind.
Get you out of those clothes.

I'm a liner away,
From getting you into the mood.
Woooah.

One night and one more time.
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren't so great.
"He tastes like you only sweeter."

One night, yeah, and one more time.
Thanks for the memories.
Thanks for the memories.
"See, he tastes like you only sweeter."

Ohhhhhh.

One more night.
One more time.
Thanks for the memories,
Even though they weren't so great.
"He tastes like you only sweeter."

One night, yeah, and one more time.
Thanks for the memories.
Thanks for the memories.
"See, he tastes like you only sweeter."

Ohhhhhh.

Labels: fall out boy

gosh,yesterday was the most tiring and terrible day in my life.

The news just hit me,i failed my english Essay.wth.English Essay failed = English fail.I broke the news to my mum regarding results.As expected,she asked me to go 4 tuition again.I don't feel like to,and it's a waste of money.

St john was infuriating.Damn.Well,i really can say i don't know how to control the sec 1s.and we had to even let the Sec 4s the take over during the P.T.but there's 1 thing i don't understand.why must we move in front when the npcc guys move.I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

Well,its hard to control a bunch of people.and we've tried so hard to make everything look alright but its still like SUCKY.the sec 1s are inco-operative.someone just like to have solo performance.tons and tons of things,and what's more we know our posts.yupps.rather saddening about that.

well,i just read a junior blog.and i kinda relfected upon what i did yesterday.for me,i know i'm not being really respected by my juniors long ago.I knew it,i know what it lies.I tried to be better towards them,be quite patient with them.

PErhaps part of the reason would be they dislike me cause for my own personal character.Like,I'm being straight towards anyone.I may be by blunt at my words.I would say i failed my subjects in front of them.Yes,i did all those.I sometimes even said vulgarities in front of them.yes,i did tried changing.I stopped myself from saying vulgarities.i stopped to be unreasonable.i tried not to be too hurting.

and i know i get downright extreme and serious with my training.PErhaps sometimes a bit sadist.I know that,but i hope you guys could understand it's for your own good.I expect the current Sec 2s to improve,the recruits to understand why would we be so strict.The Sec 1s,i must clearly tell you guys out there,the camp is much more tougher than this.PErhaps,if you were to know who were the instructors in the camp....

Well,for the Sec 2s,i know how you guys feel.When the current Sec 4s gave you guys for footdrill,you got the right feeling.but when it's the Sec 3s who gave you guys footdrill,something is not right.I could tell you something truthfully,when last year Sec 4s gave us command,we got the right feeling.but when its the current sec 4s,the feeling is wrong.Well,its hard for us to give you that kind of feeling.But we do really seek for your cooperation.

I've got nothing to say.that's what i think.

Labels: St john

i came across this blog randomly.Its nice.Read it.

http://sibehsibehsian.blogspot.com/

Labels: random

Well,early in the morning,i was late.gosh,when song rong asked mr eng to excused me,Mr Eng seems damn determine not to let me go.And you know what?i didn't know what was going on,and gave that 'huh?what thing?' face.And well,guess you guys expected,Mr Eng and i played the staring game.Till he said,gogogo.and i was released!!

school was rather ok.but not the results.according to my classmates,for my chinese paper 2 i got 70++/110.Lucky it was an average,didn't really got into the paper,just anyhow scribbled things onto it when i don't feel like doing he paper.yeaps.

A Maths as i predicted,was a DISASTER,37/100.FUCK MAN!i could have passed,if i haven't been that careless.(now,i don't know how to break the news to my mum.Cause its me who said to stop the tuition.)

Art,seem rather okay.Missed what mdm Lai's comments towards my artpiece which scored 72.Well,efforts did pay off doing that artpiece and the prep studies.But its not really that satisfying.I'm gonna strive for Amaths and those weak subs!

Mr Chuang U Ming's Funeral

well,i must say that i'm EVIL.Fancy giggling when everyone was so serious at the Singapore Casket.The problem is i don't know why i laugh.What am i thinking at the point of time.After the ceremony,we left for the mandai place.

Whereby,we were there to send Mr Chuang the last time.I should say it's a pity we didn't walked around his coffin.And some inconsiderate person,couldn't even bother to swtich off his handphone when the eldest son gave his speech representing the entire family.And the phone was ringing twice.

Well,though its my first time attending funeral,i think we should have some basic repect towards the dead.Especially towards someone who contributed to the scociety and my school.I was quite touched when his eldest son gave his speech.

Well,it drove me thinking,could we throw away all the rules and live life to the fullest?i don't know.i just had this sudden thought.mind me not.









RANDOMLY.

I found the first piece of chinese painting which i never attend for tons of years.LOLS.

Pu zhong thanks for lending me your badge.hehes.
i like being me,rules just sucks.
Get away.i don't wanna you enter my life.
Why do you always seem to attract my attention?

Labels: funeral, late, Results

There'sa reason i just don't like people.I Hate that Fatty from 1A,better he fracture his entire hand.FUCK HIM!

bored was the word for school.The CORE isn't reall nice.Its boring and draggy.Well,i could say its the worst movie i had endured.Surprisingly,i managed to be awake till the end.

the long time ago friend,sms-ed me.I don't feel like letting him into my life again.oh well~

Labels: him, movie

oh well,congrats me.i can't sleep.

Labels: sleepless

As Expected,BAD DAY.i got my 2 of my papers back.But according to Ms Ang,practically the entire Sec 3 level flunk the SS paper just for a handful of them.So,well i'm gonna be in the majority rather than minority.Cause she gave back our previous test on population,i got 3/20.

i Got back PHyics paper too.i'm angry with myself for having 14 marks of careless mistake.but indeed,i passed!31/50.What's worst is my E maths.i attained 24 marks CARELESS MISTAKE.wtf!i shouldn't got so low,61.i shoud've attained 85.why am i underperforming?gosh!i must work hard!STRIVE!

i got totally shocked by what she said.She marked my chinese paper and chninese lit paper.GOt damned shocked when she said that i was emotionally confused.Yes,i am.With the things coming up and w/o the help of my family.I admit i strive to be independent,yet,thoughts just came.i can't control them.When i'm being helpless,i cant afford to cry,that's what i know.I'm not like people who had their happy families with them,i'm just the one fighting alone.

well,all i can say is,i almost cried in front of her.i wished i could break down in front of someone,yet,i held back.Tears aren't just me.

Labels: Results, shocked

YESH!!i finally worked out the edited template!!its just that i don't know how 2 do the date thing.everything's almost done.this is my first time editing someone's template.well,i'm glad that i did i great job.hahas.

This is the original templATE.

http://blogskins.com/apply.php?sid=65925&action=Preview

Labels: edited template

damn it!i'm so sicked doing the links section!!Aarghs!!!!!1

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY.

i didn't get to celebrate it,oh well 2 years passed with this.so,those who get to celebrate,good for them.

Labels: mother's day

well well.
today could be considered a good day cause,cause everything went fine with me.as usual,being loved by the people working around me.hees,that's why i love working in mac!!
1.i kinda miss the peeps there,like nancy,yap,chakara,etc
2.i enjoy the time working,cause its always so enjoyable.
3.gahlu kissed me.sweet ehs?hahas.
4.Dave being the good guy!yeahs!got 2 ICe teas!
5.chakara's speed and kitchen job is good,i miss that fast fast thing.

not considered good.
1.My ears got pulled by YAP!he's EVIL lahs.
2.that EVIL YAP kept on ka jiao-ing me today.
3.he took my hand as chicken wing,and almost bit me.boohoos.
4.i FELL down in front of the customers and my friends today.this is the SECOND time i fell down with fries.WTF.
5.WORST,everyone turn and look at me.And Mr Chakara is bside me when i fell down.WOW?
6.well,of cos i'm being laughed by Mr CHAKARA.asking if my butt hurts 4 times!gosh!its embarrassing!
7..TAT FUCKING BASTARD kept on thinking he's a manager,complain here complain there.you think you that perfect mehs?SUCKER!then say what i'm being a nuisance,just hanging around doing nothing.FUCK YOU.i served customers too okayys and i'm doing FREE LABOUR.don't believe you ask peeps from mcCafe and the counter runners.IDIOT.and please lahs,you're just a crew leader,so BIG mehs.SUCKER!!
8.tat SUCKER wanna prove that he's PRO.WTF!keep on snatching my job!FUCKFUCKFYCK!
9.FUCK!please lahs,you dono how to do things yourself mehs?i do until so pekchek liaos lo.countercrew dono how to stock up ar?FUCK the cwp aunties and him!

i still love working there,though many bad things happened.bleahs!gtg le.byes!

Labels: mac

i just read her blog.somehow i understand how she feels,though i don't know what happen.the feeling to earn money,the helpless feeling,i know what it feels like.I went through the process once,its hurtful.well,all i can say is take care,regardless of what,carry on with life.people by your side will always encourage you,i know that.they'll sure help you.have confidence in what i said.

yeahs!the person just called!i can collect my specs tml liaos!!wahoos!

Here's something i got from friendster.
Enjou~~

A: Loves to flirt but in a way of joking
B:Popular with all types of people.
C: weird
D: Has one of the best personalities ever
E: Freaking beautiful
F: People wild and crazy adore you.
G: Never let people tell you what to do.
H: Easy to fall in love with
I: LOVES TO LAUGH
J: Freaking Rowdy
K: Really silly.
L: best smile
M: Makes dating fun
N: One of the best damn bf/gf anyone could ask for
O: Loved by everyone
P: Popular with all types of people.
Q: A hypocrite.
R: Good Gf/Bf
S: the best person anyone could have
T: great kisser
U: Gets hugs
V: Not judgmental
W: Very broad minded.
X: Never let people tell you what to do.
Y: Is a freak when it comes to parties
Z: Lives life for fun

M: Makes dating fun
I: LOVES TO LAUGHI
C: weird
H: Easy to fall in love with
A: Loves to flirt but in a way of joking
L: best smile

that's me!!hahas.

Labels: random

Art Exam finally over!!YESH!!been sleepless for 2 nights.my WORRIES finally GONE!!man,i think F&N peeps are far way better.cause they exam no need do prep work.LAst night i was damn hot doing the prep studies,and i still neeed to study chinese lit exam.WTH!stupid arrangement.the planner who plan this mids schedule is LOUSY lahs.

Then,i was like so kan chiong.from afternoon do till 11 plus.here's some picture i took.



then,i continue to mug for chinese lit,which is 1 HELL subject.lucky i managed to catch like 2 hrs of sleep.Gladys too,burn midnight oil till 5 in the morning and catch an hour of sleep.And in the morning,my eyes DAMN PANDA!!!i need a concealer liaos!!

Well,i must say Jun Feng is kinda PRO.he just wrote about four lines on his foolscape paper for dnt,and slept!totally impressed,though i think my eyes seem like diao-ing,kinda guilty.



I also must thank this girl here who accompany me to eat breakfast and make NEW SPECS!!yeahs!!



receipt of the toast i ate at YaKun.

Labels: art, chinese lit, exams, girl, new specs

gosh,i just couldn't Stop having the habit of vommiting every after meal.Like a slightly too full also could cause me to vomit.Worst of all,i'll start coughing till i vomit.YIKES.

don't know what's up with the body of mine.i'm still hesitating whether to go Genting or not.And i'm still thinking how to do my preparation studies.haiz.i don't know.

Labels: confused, the little one, vomiting

Considering stuffs ahead.

how should i present my artpiece?
should i go genting?
should i continue working or quit?
how should i treat them?
will we be one family afterall?
will i flunk my mids again?
should i have tuition again?

well,tons of questions and answers spinning in my head,and that certainly is NOT enjoyable.i'm flunking it.i'm doing this,i'm doing that.I hate this,i hate that.i don't like her,she's her bitch,fakos,bimbo.gosh,gosh,gosh!STOP those imaginations.AARGHHS!!!

FUCK IT.I MEAN IT.

Labels: random

well well,the EXAMS finally arrived.and its like WTF!i didn't study my Ss till this morning,cause i stayed up to study for A Maths.though i only had short sleeping hours,but guess it did helped and worth me studying my maths.GREAT one ehs.

WOW?!SS i didn't even study much.gosh,DISADVANTAGE.and A Maths,WORST.as usual its ms lin way of setting the paper,CONCEPTS!!Aarghs!!!i hate CONCEPTS!!!

-disheartened.

Labels: a maths, exams, ss